Less than a day and a half until the polls open on election day and I’m feeling optimistic; optimistic like watching the Yankees with the lead in the ninth inning. Chances are they will win, but baseballs sometimes have funny eyes and can land just inches away from being caught and before you know it, the game ends, the Yanks lose, and I think “what just happened?” It’s the ninth inning in the 2012 election and Obama looks like he is in a good position to win. But a day and a half is a plenty of time to allow for shenanigans; i.e. Florida is one of thirty three states controlled by the Republican party where every day there are news reports about actions taken to limit the number of people who can vote. The latest example here in Florida was a polling place in Orange county that was closed for hours yesterday due to a bomb threat. The politicians never offered additional hours to make up for the ones lost, but a Federal judge did. The polling place is open today. It is a sad and desperate political party that thinks a good way to win is to keep people away from the polls. I want it to be over…I want my party to win, because in part I don’t think it’s a good idea to repeal Obamacare, to change Medicare to a voucher program, to require women to get an invasive transvaginal ultrasound as a precondition to another medical procedure, and I really don’t think we will be better off with a President who thinks it would be a good idea to crack a window of an airplane at 35,000 feet. If however we don’t win, I’ll let Bill Maher’s recent rift on what happens if Mitt wins speak for me as it seems to feel so true to my beliefs.
“When you elect Mitt, you’re not just electing him, you’re electing every right-wing nut he’s pandered to in the last ten years.
If the Mittmobile does roll into Washington, it’ll be towing behind it the whole anti-intellectual, anti-science freak show. The abstinence obsessives, the flat earthers, home schoolers, the holy warriors, the anti-women social neanderthal, the holier-than-thou homophobes, and every end timer who sees the Virgin Mary in the grass over the septic tank.
Now I understand having issues with Obama, but stop to think of all the crap we haven’t had to deal with in the last four years. Anybody remember Terri Schiavo? Obama isn’t perfect, but he never turned the entire federal government into a Jesus-freak episode of House. And he doesn’t have an Attorney General like John Ashcroft, who once covered up a statue at the Justice Department because it was showing too much tit. Like it was Janet Jackson.
I’m just saying, last four years, no crises about boobies. No controversies about whether stem cells are actually tiny people. No Defense of Marriage Act. No Office of Faith-Based Initiatives. No peddling creationism at the national parks. Did you know that before Obama got in, the Smithsonian couldn’t mention global warming as a possible reason the glaciers were shrinking? Because heat melting ice was just a theory.”
I do not want to return to the eight years of political thinking prior to the 2008 election. Unfortunately for the country, this entire campaign on both sides has been cynical and frustrating. If Obama wins, my wife and I disagree what he needs to do for a successful second term. If he loses, we will certainly disagree as to what country we are moving to for sanity’s sake. But before the final results are known, what I worry about most is that on Monday night Mr. Romney will be trying to win an assortment of converts by being in Pennsylvania saying he was born in Philadelphia, the son of Jewish mixed-race parents who later moved to their beloved Cincinnati. And forty percent of the people listening and paying attention will believe it, and forty-seven percent of them could change their vote at the last minute and so on and so forth. Neither side has an edge in winning unless they get their base to vote. So please make sure to vote if you have not done so already. If however there is anyone who reads this and does not vote, please don’t tell me, as I will find it difficult to take seriously any of your future political opinions. Now is the time to make a vote count. I’m Alan Billingsley, and I approve of this message.